You want it to work, you really do. You swear things between you two would be amazing if only he would stop doing this and start doing that instead. You two look so good together. He's perfect on paper. The sex is hot. You're so tired of the dating scene. Blah, blah, blah.
Stop it! You know what you're doing and you know you can do better. Here are 20 very clear signs this is a situation and not a relationship , and it's going absolutely nowhere.
1. They're "too busy" to text you. There are 24 hours in a day and each of those hours holds 60 minutes. Every single one of those minutes has 60 full seconds in them. Now, write a text. How long did it take? #PointProven
2. They play the cat and mouse game. One night, they're into the relationship and the next you're reenacting Adele's "Hello." Just as you're giving up, they call to say they've thought about things. They were a fool. Please take them back. Once you do, they're gone again. Show them you stopped playing "girl chase boy" in grade school and run the other way.
3. They make everything all about them. You make sure their needs, wants and desires are met, which leaves literally zero room for you in their me, me, me world.
4. They use gaslighting techniques as a way to keep you in check. Gaslighting is a phrase assigned to an emotional abuse technique that has one partner convincing the other that reality is an illusion. If your partner is denying they said and did things or blaming you for saying and doing things you didn't, it's abusive.
5. Your partner is a dick. Healthy, normal adults know how to speak to and treat others like human beings. There's no power or charm in being an assh*le.
6. They disrespect things that are important to you. Whether it's a religious belief they don't share or a hobby they aren't interested in, you don't need to be with someone who can't treat the things you value with respect.
7. They don't support you. Support is a lot more than just not saying they don't support the things you're doing. Do they show up when you need someone there? Do they stay up and help you practice your presentation, and show an active interest in how things are progressing? When you fall, are they there to catch you and offer you a hand back up? What's the good of being with someone who doesn't have your back?
8. They don't introduce you to people in their lives. Yes, it takes time to be invited home to meet the parents, but if you're five months in and no one knows you beyond your name, he's not serious about you.
9. They make you feel like you can't say anything right. Is your guy constantly picking fights with you and misinterpreting everything you say? Do you feel like you're running around in circles and defending yourself even when you're being nice? Unless you're speaking in code, there's a bigger problem and it has nothing to do with you.
10. They constantly say "sorry" for the same thing. Sorry is just a word unless there's a real effort made to not make the same mistake again.