I am a silent follower of your blog. I been following since November last year. I admire what you do.keep up the good work. What I didnt envisage is that one day,I will be writing you, asking you advice on the blog. But right now,I may need some objective advice cos I really need to make a decision that could affect my life for ever.
I am an events planner. I have been in a relationship for three years. We started making plans to get married this year,precisely in Easter. Jonathan,my fiance owns his own business too. Our relationship has not been without challenges. Infact,it has been with one challenge or the other. The most coming from Jonathan. His line of business makes him be around many ladies and many tend to flirt with him. I dare say,he even allows it cos to him,its part of networking he needs for his business. I always told him I didnt like it but he told me its necessary. He promised its just networking,nothing more.
Unfortunately though,in December last year,just before new year,I was very busy planning various events that I hadnt seen Jonathan in like three weeks. He would stop sometimes briefly at my place to check up on me. I was really under pressure at the time. I had a late meeting at a five star hotel on the Island. The meeting was with some Clients. They wanted us to discuss their end of year party event. The meeting was for 8pm. So here I was at this meeting by the pool side,having my meeting,then a couple making out at the pool caught my attention. Their display of PDA kept distracting me and after my meeting,as I left,I got a little close to the pool and behold,my fiance was busy cuddling and squashing another woman in the pool. I called him and he looked at me and froze for a second.
One of Client I met earlier saw me from their table and walked over me when he noticed a small commotion with me and Jonathan. He walked over and asked me what was going on,I told him that I had just been cheated on by my fiance. He apologized and walked me out. I was so embarrassed and pained. I got home and cried a river that night. Jonathan came straight to my place but I didnt even let him in. I broke up with him that night.I was an emotional mess and I couldn’t handle most of my appointments. I had to drop some businesses. I dropped the event I had gone to plan at the hotel. But the Client reached out to me. The same guy who witnessed Jonathan and me at the unfortunate incident. His name is Ben.
Ben was really sorry I was going through a heart break and he told me he also suffered a heartbreak. According to him,his wife cheated on him with his friend. They have a daughter and they were going through a divorce. I felt bad for him. Our situations kind of drew us together. We became friends and before long,we became inseparable. Ben made me forget Jonathan and the heartbreak. I discovered a new kind of friendship and love. With Ben,there was no drama. It was just fun,gisting and doing nice things. I was quite happy. In February,I was fully dating Ben. He was such a kind man,I dont know why his wife would be so stupid to leave him. Any lady would die to have him.
In March,Jonathan came back and was seriously begging me. He pulled all stunts,he bought me a car,he used my parents,his parents,my friends,my colleagues,everyone to beg me. I told him I had moved on but he said he understands that I may be trying to move on but he knows I would always love him as he does love me. We had been together for three years. Jonathan didnt give up,he kept on and I decided to forgive him and give him a second chance. I went to Ben and told him. Of course,Ben didnt want to let me go. He also asked me to stay with him. He said he was in love with me. I was confused by my best friend,Ella told me to follow my head not my heart cos clearly Ben was a rebound. My pastors too counselled me to stick with Jonathan cos I had only known Ben for just three months.
I yielded eventually and broke up with Ben,he was so heart broken and he told me he would be waiting for me if I changed my mind. I began to plan my traditional wedding to Jonathan just before Easter. I was still quite confused. I was thinking about Ben more than I was thinking about Jonathan. I became afraid that I was making a mistake. On the day of the traditional wedding day,as I was dressing up,I knew I couldnt do it. But I also didnt want to embarrass my family. While everyone was happy at the ceremony,I was sad,I began to cry. I just couldnt anymore. I took and excuse and went inside. My mother and my friends ran after me. I told them I couldnt go through with the wedding. I was sorry. All hell broke loose. My father came in and began to talk but I just got up and drove off. I went straight to Ben’s place.
When I got there,he was not home. Infact,I saw a car parked in the compound. A lady was waiting for Ben too. When she saw me,she came down and asked who I was. I told her I was Ben’s friend and I wanted to see him. She told me she was Ben’s wife. That Ben went to the gym but will soon be back. She asked if I was Thelma. I was quite shocked,like how did she know my name. She said Ben had been talking about me. Since I broke up with Ben,he reached out to her and they began to work out their marriage. According to her,the way I was fighting for my relationship,even after my fiance cheated on me, inspired Ben to forgive her and they have been trying to work things out for a week now. She asked me what I came to see Ben for. I became tongue tied. Here I was,standing in front of a woman who is trying to get back to the man I loved. She began to thank me for giving their marriage a second chance.
I couldnt take it anymore. I began to cry and told her I just called off my wedding. I love Ben. She held me and hugged me. Like sisters,we held each other and cried. I was surprised at her reaction. We talked afterwards. She said we all make mistakes and sometimes our heart wants someone else but we have to take what we get if we can manage it. As we talked,Ben came in. I took my leave and started to leave. Ben wanted me to stay . His wife wanted me to stay but I couldnt. Seeing them together,I saw how good they were together,they even have a four year old daughter. I knew this wasn’t my place anymore.
When I got home,I met Jonathan waiting for me. I hugged him and he embraced me. I knew my heart was with Ben but Jonathan has promised to make me fall in love with him again. Please do you think this is a good idea? I know I feel something for Jonathan but I feel something deeper for Ben. We have decided to just have a quiet court wedding cos of the embarrassment I caused at the traditional wedding in Easter. But at the back of my mind,I am scared. Will my marriage to Jonathan work? Knowing that I love someone else much more? Should I fight to get Ben back? Clearly,he might still want me..Will my marriage to Jonathan even have any chance? Am I making a mistake or do you think I can possibly fall back in love with Jonathan again?