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One Night From Twelve Years Ago Is Now Tearing My Marriage Apart

My wife left me yesterday and she took my children away with her. I have been looking for her and no one wants to tell me where she is. She switched off her phone and I cant reach her. Well,yes,something happened that made her leave. Something that happened 12 years ago when we were not even married.

While we were dating in 2005 -2006,my wife (then my girlfriend) were always having issues. Some times we break up and make up after weeks. There was a time we broke up for almost one month. During that time,her younger sister came to my place. She was 19 years at the time. That was not her first time of coming to see me. Her family members and I are very close. She came and we while we were jisting,she said she broke up with her boyfriend and she was really heartbroken. She was in a bad shape that day so she came around just to talk to me cos she felt both of us were in the same boat seeing that both of us were having issues with our relationship. We spent that fateful Saturday in my place,watching movies and doing other stuff but we ended up sleeping with each other. She wanted to end her virginity. I regret yielding to her and we both regretted it and promised each other to keep it a secret.

What she didnt tell me was that she actually got pregnant after that day. She had an abortion without my knowledge. All these happened during the time I broke up with her sister for a month. We made up after that and two years later we got married.Everything has been fine until this month,almost 10 years later. Ene,my wife’s younger sister has been married for almost four years now and she has not been able to have a child. This has been causing serious issues in her marriage. After several tests,it was discovered that her Fallopian tube was damaged by a crude abortion done years ago. Ene became hopeless and inconsolable. And in her depression,she felt she needed to confess to her sister so that she would be healed and have a chance to get pregnant.
That confession didn’t go well with her sister,my wife. She of course,blamed me for her sister’s predicament. She is accusing me of taking advantage of her sister when she was a teenager. Her family too is so upset. They say I have ruined the sisters. What no one is considering is that,one,we slept together when her sister and I broke up…how were we to know that we would come back to get married in future? Secondly,I didn’t force the girl,she was willing. She was not a baby,she was 19. Thirdly,this girl didn’t tell me she got pregnant. If I knew,perhaps,I would have done things differently. Maybe we could have kept the baby or if she truly wanted to have an abortion,it would not have been done in a crude way that destroyed her ability to have children now. Why is no one apportioning the same blame to Ene?
I feel bad that my wife feels betrayed by me. But this happened 12 years ago and since then,I have never cheated on my wife. Why cant she forgive me? I dont want to loose my wife,my kids. What do I do? I am ready to do anything, please advice me. (kindly use a fake name when you post this)


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