Francis got married five years ago. He has a very beautiful family now; a daughter, a son and a beautiful wife to match. Just some months before his wedding, I was his girlfriend. We had dated two years prior. I didn’t get the hint. He cut links with me and later told me; “I don’t think it’s going to work. Look at both of us, we are so different in everything. It would be difficult for us to work.”
I didn’t understand him. I didn’t see the difference he was talking about but that was enough for him to call it quit. A few months later, he got married to a woman who was not so different from the way I was.
It broke me into pieces. I couldn’t do anything for so long. I thought my life had ended. And when I realized it hasn’t, I thought of ending it myself. Nothing made sense to me; love, life, relationships, giving your all, nothing made sense to me. And this one hit me so hard because it was the second time I’ve been through that.
The first was Eugene. He was my all until one day he became my nothing. His’ was very dramatic. He just disappeared! Sometimes I think of it and I laugh. We were young so it was easier to forgive him.
After Francis, I made up my mind to take my time and take life very slowly. I didn’t want to rush into things that would collapse on me later but life has a way of bringing things you didn’t ask for.
One morning, I received a message on Facebook; “It’s been a while. Are you so busy you can’t even comment on my post again?”
The message was from a guy I knew so well on my timeline. He was always posting funny stuff and I usually went there to comment. When I saw the message, I smiled and responded; “Thanks for checking up on me. I’ve not been coming to Facebook a lot these days.”
We didn’t have a lot to say that day but he kept talking to me from that day on. As usual, he was funny and difficult to ignore. So our chats became a daily thing. Sometimes we could go till late at night. We mostly didn’t have to say “Good night” because we spoke until one fell asleep.
Very soon, we were talking about personal stuff and digging into each other’s past love life. I saw where the whole thing was heading towards but I was so into him that I couldn’t stop it.
One night I asked him; “How old are you?” He said twenty-seven. I told him; “I’m thirty-two. You see why love between us won’t be possible?” He answered, “Someone has to be older in every relationship and you’re lucky to be that one in ours.” He ended it with laughing emojis.
This guy could never say anything wrong. That night, I invited him to travel the next day to visit me. And the next morning, he made a four-hour bus journey to my place. When he called to tell me he was at the station, my heart skipped several beats. I didn’t know what to expect and I didn’t know if he would still like me after physically seeing me.
When I finally saw him, he embraced me and almost lifted me from the ground. I thought, “Ouuu he likes me.” All my fears and insecurities vanished. That was the point I realized my heart was in love again. We spent two days together in each other’s embrace. We made plans. He told me jokes. We laughed and made love.
When he got back to where he came from, He sent me a message; “The best day of my life was the day I was born. The next best day was the time spent with you.” He told me how he enjoyed his stay and how he would love to do it again and again. He even told me to get things ready because it wouldn’t be too long until we got married.
It was my turn to visit him. We planned my visit to coincide with Valentine’s day.
Early morning on Val’s day, I set off to see my love. I had his hamper stuffed with all his favorite things. I couldn’t wait to have a repeat of what happened when he was with me.
In the middle of the journey, I slept off. When I reached the town and took my phone from my bag, I realized he had called me severally. I called back and with a smile, I said, “I’m in town. You were calling, you couldn’t wait to see me?” He said, “I will pick you up in the next fifteen minutes.”
Fifteen minutes went. Soon it was twenty minutes. And then twenty-five. And then thirty. That was when I thought he was getting late so I called. He didn’t pick the first call. He didn’t pick the second either. Just about five minutes later, I called the third time. His phone was off.
I called and called and called but each time, I got the same response; “The number you’ve dialed cannot be reached…”
I believed he was on his way coming. I was wrong. He stood me up. After four hours of waiting and not hearing anything from him, I gave up and picked a bus home.
Fourteen days later, he called with a different line giving me long explanations to why things happened the way it did. I already knew the truth so I wasn’t listening to his lies.
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I told him, “You are a married man. Why didn’t you tell me the truth?” I found out your wife came home unannounced that day that’s why you stood me up. What did I do wrong to deserve that?”
I was close to tears but I didn’t want him to hear me cry so I cut off the line before he could muster the courage to tell me one more lie. He sent messages apologizing to me and asking what he could do to pacify me. I only asked him to stay away from me.
Today, I look back and I’m thankful for his close friend who had pity on me and told me the truth. He saved me from myself and most importantly saved me from a pending disaster.
—Cynthia, Accra, Ghana